Monday, October 21, 2013

Happy Fall Ya'll

Well, we finally made it to the pumpkin farm and it was well worth it.  Seems like it gets harder to have a posed picture with Luke but you can probably tell he loved it.  I'm pretty sure I've got a little country boy at heart.

The petting zoo was probably the highlight for Luke :)

Anyone else think he's avoiding eye contact???

He was but then....

Not so much here...

What are yooooou looking at?

Two peas in a pod... But yes, thank you for the sign.  I'm definitely counting my blessings for these two.

Cuz what's a farm "petting zoo" without a longhorn?  Random, no?

Luke loved these goats!

Hmmmm...  too many to choose!


Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Is this too long to Tattoo on my forehead as a reminder?

If you're my friend "in real life", or even a "Facebook friend" of mine, it's no secret that I'm mildly obsessed with the blog Momastery.  I often email articles, save them to my "parenting e-file" or share them on Facebook.  And this, this is little nugget does not disappoint.... THIS is good stuff.


When we were little, many of us learned that God made a garden called Eden and God put the first two people there – Adam and Eve. Then God gave them everything they needed and one thing they didn’t need – which was a tree in the middle of the garden called “the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.” God told them not to eat from that tree. But Eve did, and her eyes were opened – and everything got all kinds of jacked up after that.
I was taught that Eden is a story about temptation. That our nature is to do the opposite of what God says to do, and that causes problems for us. But since I was little I’ve been wondering if this story is also about the dangers of trying to know what is good and what is bad. Maybe it wasn’t just defying God that screwed everything up for poor Eve- maybe it was that she insisted on Knowing Something Unknowable.
Maybe wanting to know what will be good for us and what will be bad for us causes all our trouble. Because we should all be ready to admit by now that we suck at knowing the difference between what is good and what is bad for us.
If you ask folks what their wildest dream is many would say: winning the lottery,  even though this is often the kiss of death for families. We want MORE STUFF- even though it’s been proven again and again that after our basic needs our met- more stuff doesn’t make us happier. We collect and hoard and hold on tight to our money- even though we KNOW that giving feels better. We want to be smart- even though happiness and intelligence are inversely related. We  trade our time for cars and fancy clothes and shiny houses and then we realize all we’ve gained is more stress and higher bills- and in the end – we just want all that time back. Stuff that tastes good makes us feel bad, but we eat it anyway. We say things that feel good to “get off our chests” and we feel awful about it later. We want to become famous even though we know that fame destroys. We are desperate for perfectly “typical” kids even though parents with special needs kids consider them the biggest blessings of their lives. We avoid poverty even though God promises us the Kingdom is there. We avoid heartbreak by any means necessary even though that’s where the peace and connection and meaning is. We act like we are perfect even though nobody trusts perfect. We really want to be loved but choose being envied again and again.
I  receive oodles of emails (from non-religious folks) saying: “Why do you think you’re so broken? Why do you wallow in brokenness? You are WHOLE.” And (from religious folks) I often hear: “You need more Jesus. Jesus is all you need.”
But for goodness sake. Jesus promises not to leave us ALONE, he doesn’t promise not to leave us HUMAN. And to clarify – I don’t want to be “whole.” I want to be busted up and beautiful.  While I’m still here, I want to be FULLY HUMAN.
I talk about my addictions because everything beautiful in my life right now came out of the ugliness back then. And still does. I talk about my Lyme disease because I didn’t become strong and peaceful until I learned to surrender to my weakness and mania. I talk about my intolerance and jealousy and sadness and neurosis because those things make me HUMAN and I think that being a messy hypocritical, busted up human is a brutiful honor.
I talk about my flailing marriage because ( and a year ago I’d have ripped your well-meaning head off if you’d predicted this to me) the truth is that my marriage had to be shattered before it could be pieced back together. My marriage was like a busted arm that The Doctor had to re-break before it could heal right. A year ago- it all fell apart. Yes it did. And I about died. But now. Just a year later – my marriage is excruciating and real and true and deep and GORGEOUS for the first time. For the very first time. It also still sucks. It hurts and burns and refuses to leave me in peace – like every crucible does. But damned if all that discomfort didn’t turn out to be the good stuff. Like the Velveteen Rabbit – maybe neither people nor marriages become Real until the shine and newness rubs off and they look ugly and worn out to the rest of the world but real and soft and comforting and lovely to the one who holds them. This past year has been a special slice of hell for me and Craig-  and I never, ever thought  it would get better. I had no outward hope for a long while– but I kept showing up, and so did Craig. We kept fiercely and relentlessly showing up. We did NOT commit to each other this past year. We individually committed to the Spiritual Practice of Showing Up.
And last week I looked at Craig and thought- Holy SHIT. I think I love him. For the first time. For the first time - I respect the hell out of this man. It took a year of tears and faith and sweat and therapy and prayer and more tears and it will always be hard. It will always be hard and that’s okay. We have proved to our kids and ourselves that We Can Do Hard Things.
And so- when I talk about this stuff- this messy stuff in my life – I have a PURPOSE.  I’m not “wallowing in brokenness.” I’m trying to suggest that maybe THE BUSTED UP STUFF IS THE GOOD STUFF.  We resist that idea because we really, really suck at being judges of things. God didn’t ask us not to judge so we’d be nice people. God asks us not to judge for the same reason Craig asks me not to cook- because We just plain SUCK AT IT. So we should just leave that tree to God.
I’m trying not to judge my own life by the world’s standards because my suspicion is that often – our bad is God’s good and our good is God’s bad. The last are first and the first are last. When we start seeing clearly- we learn that it’s always opposite day. In my life- the brutal ALWAYS transforms into the beautiful.  And so after thirty eight years I have learned this about what life is offering me: IF IT’S EASY AND SHINY- BEWARE. IF IT STINGS A LITTLE – SIT TIGHT, GET CURIOUS, AND THEN LEAN IN.

I used to say: I’m broken. Fix me. Then I grew up a little and said : WAIT A MINUTE. I’M NOT BROKEN. And now I’m a real grown up so I say: Of course I’m broken. And I love, love, love myself that way. If you’re comfortable with that – come sit with me and we can laugh and cry and be broken and beautiful together. But don’t try to fix me- I didn’t ask for that. I just asked for some good company in which to be human.
Be Still in your garden and trust that you don’t need to decide what is good in your life and what is bad. You can stop striving for good and resisting bad and instead –  surrender to all of it. You can stop judging your circumstances and your life and your people. Striving for good and resisting bad is the source of all of our worry, all of our stress. All our problems stem from our refusal to surrender to what IS. To what life is and who people are. Let it be. Let it come, whatever it is. Breathe deeply and know that if you let it come and feel it all – it won’t kill you. It will pass away soon enough and leave you better, kinder, softer, and stronger. Let the brutal make you even more beautiful.

Thank you, Glennon for providing a shred of light on some of the dark.  That little flicker is sometimes all that we need to get through the broken mess.  

Tuesday, August 6, 2013


Today was going to be a big reveal here...  We were supposed to find out yesterday if Luke was getting a baby brother or sister.  Yep, at nearly the end of my first trimester, I’d managed to keep it quiet on both Facebook and this blog.  A major accomplishment for me to keep a secret, even if it was just a secret on the web.  But instead, our day yesterday was filled with tears.  Anger.  Sadness.  Rage.  Heartbreak.  And more tears.

Yesterday, we found out that we will not be meeting our baby in March as planned.  Luke will not be a big brother, at least not this spring.  A sonogram showed fluid on our baby’s brain and an ablation on his or her abdomen.  With those two monumental and most certainly life altering additions the sonogram, there was also one giant thing missing.  No heartbeat.  The baby measured gestationally correct and the doctor concluded that the miscarriage was extremely recent, likely even the day before.

Our baby that we watched on the sonogram just weeks before...the little heartbeat was racing as we gripped each other’s hands in excitement.  Gone.  In an instant. Visions of a family of four shattered and pieced back together as three.

Yes, we are heartbroken.  Yes, we are completely blindsided.  No, we don’t have answers.  But we will work through this.  Just like we have before.  Except this time, we have Luke to focus on, how extremely lucky we are to have him and we are trying to show him even more now how important he is to us.  And we are beyond grateful that he is blissfully unaware of the loss.

I can honestly say it’s with conflicted emotions that we celebrate his second birthday today.  He’s growing so fast and makes us proud each time he learns something new, gets excited, smiles….and we still think he’ll make an awesome big brother someday.  Yet we are downtrodden.  Worried about our future.  Worried about our little family.  The good news is, we’ve known since the second we laid eyes on Luke that he’s a fighter.  Now, given the repeating heartbreak, we are even more convinced that he’s also our miracle.

If you’re into praying, we could sure use some.  If you’ve got good vibes, please send them our way.  But most importantly, cut someone some slack today.  Cut yourself some slack today.  Maybe someone else is less willing to share what’s going on in their background.  Or maybe you're a little short with someone or can't live up to expectations.  Give everyone, including yourself, the benefit of the doubt and a *maybe* even a free pass.  We all have our loads to carry and some days it’s a little lot heavier than others.

Until we meet again…I’m taking a little bloggy break.  

Friday, July 19, 2013

Summa Summa Tiiiiiime

Well, clearly we are loving this summer and spending more time outdoors than at the computer to blog! 

Last weekend, my little man became a road trip pro. 

We drove six hours northeast to Grand Lake 'O the Cherokees in the most NE corner of Oklahoma.  Ya'll.... I had no idea how beautiful this part of the country is!  There are these steep rock cliffs that drop down to the water.  Soooo pretty!

We met my sister in law and her family, and my "cousin in law"(???? is that a real thing, my husband's cousin?)  and his family.  In all, there were six kiddos including Luke and I must say, they all had a blast and got along so well!

I've decided Luke was born to be a lake rat.

He even went on the jet ski with daddy...SLOWLY since mama was standing on the dock ready to jump in to save my baby!

And for those of you who frequent the lake regularly, if you haven't invested in a Lily Pad (and it IS an investment), you need to do, now.  Luke had a blast running up and down this thing and it let me sort of relax a little bit.

 I mean, between the lily pad, and a life jacket and six adults watching him, I decided my nugget was safe.

We had so much fun that we want to make it an annual or monthly thing!   Thanks to my sister-in-law for the invite, the delicious meals and the hospitality... it was a much needed family vacation! 

Until next time, Grand Lake! 

Monday, June 17, 2013

Dodged a Bullet...

For a week or so we've been a little worried.  See, my handsome husband might, maybe sometimes talk like the military man that he was once was...aka swear like a Coast Guard sailor.  Well, seemed like our little parrot had picked up a naughty word.  One of the classics.  Anyone ever heard a nearly two year old say "shit"?  Funny the first time.  The second, third, fiftith time not so cute.  
We really were starting to think we had corrupted our son's (already lagging) language.  I mean, he can barely say "mama" ("ma") and "dada" ("da") but this was clear as a bell.  I fully expected a call from daycare every day.   

Until this morning, I was getting him dressed and he kinda freaked.  Pulled on his collar and said shit over and over. 

Ohhhhhh.  SHIRT, honey. You want your shirt off?

Get your head out of the gutter, mama.  Geez.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Videos of "the Bull"

This child!!!!  He's such a rough and tumble boy.  I'll let these speak for themselves since I really don't have any excuse. 

Yep, that's the body slam he mastered last week.  Makes this redneck heart swell with pride!  Ok, not really, but it's pretty funny.  He even does sound effects --- hahaha!

And please tell me someone else has a nearly two year old that has started headbutting?   <crickets, crickets>   No?  Just me?  Hmmmm...  Where does he get this stuff?!?!?!?!

Honestly though, he's just like his daddy...  on the exterior so tough (and a little rough around the edges) but underneath all that, he has the sweetest heart and is surprisingly sensitive.  Last night, he started whining so I pretended to cry.  He sat down next to me and just patted my leg.  Tough and sweet I tell ya, winning combo!

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Well, well, well...

Long time no blog... Sorry 'boutcha.  Didn't mean to leave you hanging. 
Liars...  I know you didn't notice!   :)
Things have been a smidge hectic lately, but I've accepted that's just life.  BUT - I think I got in my ten acts of kindness, but lets list them out and see, shall we? 

1.  Left a bag of candy and a "have a great day" note on a co-worker's desk.  Just because.
2.  Sent a thinking of you note to a friend I've really missed but lost touch with lately.
3.  Helped a woman with a screaming child like mine to load her boxes from Costco.
4.  Left a note for the next person at Avis that got "my car"---  "Careful!  There were ants in here but I think I got them" with my can of ant killer just in case.  (Maybe not so nice if I freaked them out!?!?)
5.  Let a uniformed soldier take my place in the front of the line at security at LAX.
6.  Shared my umbrella to get someone to their car in the rain.
7.  Gave a snack size bag of chips and a bottle of water to the airport valet.

Surely I'm nice enough that I've done more than this but I'm really struggling.... maybe I'm just so "naturally" nice that I don't take notice of them...errrrr something.  UGH, well, I've got a little over a week to finish off strong!  Taking suggestions since clearly, I'm just not that nice of a person! 

Other than that, we've moved to the new house:

I'll give a tour of the inside soon...
but let's just say if I didn't have to move for forty years, it'd be too soon!!!!
Lots of landscaping is planned as the flower beds are pretty wimpy but we'll get it looking good in no time!

Played at the park with cousins:

Played in the baby pool and the neighborhood pool:

Clearly this is the baby pool in the backyard, but he LOVES the neighborhood pool!

Done lots and lots of breathing treatments:

Which means lots and lots of Thomas Videos... and somehow my almost two year old found a Snoop Dog/Thomas the Train remix.  Who makes this junk?  Anyways,  I'll forfeit my mother of the year award pride and share this video.  But please don't judge (or at least judge silently and don't leave any nasty comments!).  Yes, there are moving boxes in the back.  No, we don't make our bed when we are recovering from moving the day before every day.  We've joked about how someday our kids are going to be so embarrassed when their friends get in the car and we are "so embarrassing!" and play rap or whatever like we're cool.  Apparently, if this is any indication, we were way wrong.

I'm so tempted to delete this.  Does everyone hate the way they sound on video?  I hope that's not what my friends have to hear all the time.  Holy annoying.

I made a new wreath for our new front door.  Feeling crafty lately!

And after missing a week of "school" due to illness, Luke has learned all kinds of new, "great" tricks. And by cool tricks, we're talking a body slam.  I know, I know... we probably shouldn't allow it, but it's so funny how hard he works to throw all 22 pounds of himself on you. 

***I have video but just can't handle how annoying I sound. Maybe I can be quiet enough tonight to get a new one and add it in :)

I know this video is dark, but the intent was to be "calming down" before bed.  Instead, Luke decided the other night,  he'd rather play right up until the last minute and then he says when it's over.  From here, he just walked into his room and stood next to his rocking chair waiting for me to come in there!  Such a big boy these days!

I can't believe it's June already.... I feel a bit like we're driving through the mountains.  At 100mph.  Blindfolded... but so far we're all in one piece so... BRING IT ON!

Monday, May 13, 2013

Sending Love...

Wow, what an amazing Mother's Day.  I really felt beyond blessed this year to have a healthy little boy that made me a mama, and a husband that worked so hard to make it a special weekend, let alone day.

And that got me thinking...  (I know, I shouldn't start thinking...that's when things get wild around here...)

As blessed as I was feeling, who out there was having a rotten day because it's Mother's Day?  Those wishing desparately to have a baby in their life.  Trying and hoping and hanging onto the thought of becoming a mama.  Or those that are single mamas, and don't have a husband to coordinate for the littles.  Or, God bless them, those that have lost their spouses and are facing this holiday alone. 

How did I get so lucky?  What makes me any different?  And it hit me.  Nothing makes me different.  No one is protected from this crazy life.  And, as brutal as that is, something about it made me feel a little more connected to this little world we live in.  And I want to do something about it.  Do something to make it a better place to live. 

SO, if you had a tough day yesterday, know that you were on my mind.  I'm sending love your way and thanking you for all your hard work, whether you are a mother in the traditional sense or not.  We can all make it a better place to live.

In honor of all those that maybe wished it wasn't Mother's Day yesterday, I'm going to focus on doing ten acts of kindness over the next month or so.  It's not a lot.  And it's not flashy.  But it's a start. 

Happy Mother's Day.  Or Non-Mother's Day.  Whatever it is you're into.  You. Are. Loved.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Our New Normal

I think it's safe to say, chaos is my "new normal".  Maybe not new...For as long as I can remember my dad has always told me that I was the most organized person he's ever met that can exist in a constant state of drama.  Well, not one to disappoint let me completely oversimplify a couple things.

1.  Our house is on the market.  And twice the sale has fallen through.  So there's been a bit of uncertainty around if we were moving.  If so, when, where... all that fun.

2.  Luke's babysitter had to give notice.  He's moved from personalized, one on one, in home care to an in-home daycare with five other kids.  No comment on how this is going other than to say it's rotten.  And totally not for wimps.  (Or maybe we are the wimps and that's why it's hard?  I digress... but let's just say he's thrown himself down on the ground kicking, screaming and spitting the past two drop offs.)
3.  An offer was accepted on our house and the closing is scheduled for June 3.  That means we are moving out May 24.  Fortunately, we found a house in the same neighborhood, have scheduled to transfer utilities, all that good stuff... and it's completely a done deal as of yesterday.

So, you can imagine my tremendous sense of relief when we knew as of last night that we had a place to move, it's still in the same neighborhood, not going to completely bankrupt us, signed, funded all that.  I literally walked in the door last night feeling like a huge load had been lifted.

And then I hear dripping.  It wasn't raining (outside).  A pipe in the attic had backed up and was leaking through our ceiling, down the blinds and dripping onto the window seat.

So, yep chaos.  It's the new normal....  Instead of buying packing tape and throwing our belongings haphazardly into boxes tonight, this mama is headed to happy hour with some girls at work. 

Have a lovely day!  Bring your rain boots (and packing tape.  and a bottle of wine) if you plan on dropping by my house this weekend!

And to add some sweetness to all this sass....
Hitting Target like a ladies man

Eating dirt, no big deal...

Deciding that clothes are overrated, clearly...

Makin it rain

Mobile naps, a way of life when you're showing your house!

Hijacking a friends truck since toys are put away at home

Daddy's in charge of teaching all the really important riding a scooter!

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Easter Pics

Easter was so fun this year to see Luke pick up on the idea behind the Easter egg hunt.  He (of course) had a Thomas the Train easter basket...his obsession with Thomas has gone from average to full throttle and we live and breathe Thomas (or Tah!) from the time he wakes up until he goes to bed!

Off to hunt for eggs... with Thomas in hand

Not too sure about these confetti eggs...  Where's the candy!?!?!?

Must find more eggs!

Nope, this one doesn't have candy either! 

This one looks like a keeper!

Ditched the basket for better agility!

When it was all said and done, the Easter Bunny brought confetti eggs, blow-up swords, candy, dollar bills, a monster truck (toy, duh)  and beef jerky (for daddy).  Happy Easter!

Note the fancy folding chairs!  We had fun with Nana, Poppa, Cousins, Aunts and Uncles so it was a full house!

After lunch the "big kids" (errrrr, grown ups, whatever!) played whiffle ball in the driveway.  My sister-in-law totally sacrificied her body to keep one from going in the street.  And because we are so sensitive, we couldn't stop laughing long enough to find out if she was okay.  Poor thing!

After that, I held Luke on lock down to avoid him getting nailed!

It was a long day but we were still sad to go!  See you next year, Easter Bunny!

Monday, March 11, 2013

Can YOU do the Harlem Shake?

Well, what's a girl to do when the hubby is out of town for a weekend?  Gather her little boy, her big brothers and neice and nephew to film a Harlem Shake video.  Duh.  Because we're cutting edge like that.

In all seriousness though, I get that this whole Harlem Shake thing is weird and usually it's not that funny.  Unless you watch one person at a time.  And of course, with my mama blinders, I think Luke is hilarious.  Of course he had to be the token guy in his underwear jumping around.  Awesome.... Check it out for yourself!

Thursday, March 7, 2013


Have I really been a married woman for four years?  In so many ways it seems like so much longer - I think because I can't imagine life any other way--- but then I think back to the wedding and the honeymoon and it seems like just a little bit ago that we were so fortunate to have so many friends and family in the same room to mark the occasion with us.  Four years sounds so short.  Especially the way time flies by these days or when I think about my grandparents that were married almost 75 years.  But when I think about how drastically our lives have changed for the better in these past four years, it puts things into perspective.

Four Years
1,460 days
208 weekends
35,040 hours
3 houses
4 new jobs (combined)
2 international vacations (Costa Rica and Mexico)
Lots of weekend get aways
32 days of visiting our heart outside our body (Luke in the NICU) which brings me to...
By far our coolest "accomplishment", one crazy little boy

I'm so lucky to have married a man that makes me laugh.  That loves our family with all his heart.  Who sants to be the best husband, father, and friend that he can be.  If you want to see the night that started our married life, our slide show is still out there, which makes me happy to no end.  You can watch it here:  Carrie & Kelsey Wedding Slide Show

What a fun celebration that was, and honestly one that I feel like continues on!  Here's to another fourTY or so more!  Definitely going to dust the 'ol album off and flip through it tonight while we eat a fancy dinner of frozen pizza or Eggos or something.  But don't worry, we're celebrating big on Saturday.  Luke's spending the night with his Nana and Poppa and Kelsey and I are heading out on the town!

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Remember the Alamo! (and an 18 mos update)

First, how cute is lil Davie Crockett in his coon skin cap?

Ok, now that we are all in agreement that he is precious.... let's get down to the business of his 18 month recap.  (or you can totally quit reading, but I have to document this or it will go right out the window)

WOW.  18 months.  You're getting so big.  You are definitely a "toddler" now I'm sure, and between running and discovering new things and trying to test boundries, you are non-stop action.  And while I'd love to sit here and tell you what a joy you've been to be around, honestly, between your one year molars finally showing up (all together and a little late to the party!) and the temper tantrums, we've all kind of been struggling the last week or three.  Although it's not been all glitter and rainbows, you definitely impress me with your focus -- when you want something, you want it and you want stop until you get it.  And you are so strong willed (no, baby, that's NOT code for brat.  I promise.).  Both of these qualities will be such a blessing when you are a little older but right now it seems like it's "your way or the floor that you throw yourself on screaming and kicking highway".

The good news is that you are a healthy, active boy just like I always pray(ed) you would be.  You are accomplishing so much and your daddy and I truly believe once you can communicate even more, you won't be quite so frustrated and in turn, we won't be so frustrated!  Here's your big stats:

Weight:     23 pounds, 4 oz      (15th percentile)
Height:      31 inches                (10th percentile)
Head:        18.5 inches             (25th percentile)

Gross motor skills ---- you are running, walking (you can even walk backwards!), climbing, trying to jump, you kick the ball, throw the ball and you are just overall a strong lil fella! 

Fine motor skills ---  we love to watch you work your little fingers.  You pick up small things and stack and sort so well.  Your favorite thing right now is your Uncle Jay's Nerf gun and you load the "darts" in so carefully.  I can't even figure out how to use the darn thing but you've got it nailed.  Please don't start shooting at people (even if it is Nerf, you will give this mama a nervous breakdown)

Body parts you know---  eyes, head, nose (your favorite), ears, mouth (you stick your tongue out!), teeth, belly, boobies (your's, not mine), toes, feet, arms

Words you are using ---  mama (over and over and over), dada, annabelle, doggy, "baaaaah" (with a sweet wave and a southern drawl, this is my favorite), hi, nnnnas (nose), mmmm (when something is yummy), "ba" (bottle, which  you have successfully said bye to, congrats big boy!), boom!, pow!, ball, no, fish, bird, "shs" (shoes), "turk" (truck), "cah" (car), "nahnah" (nana), "pahpah" (papa), Jay, Pop...  There may actually be more that I'm forgetting, but the point is your Dr. girlfriend was way impressed with your verbal development. 

Your dad and I are so proud of you and can NOT believe you are now closer to 2 than 1.  Seriously, who said you could grow up so fast?!?!?!  We love you lil man!

Friday, February 1, 2013

Dear Baby

Dear not so baby Baby,

Luke. Well you certainly keep your mama on her toes! Tonight was the first night you went to bed without a bottle. We had planned to stop a couple of weeks ago but mama was traveling for work and was honestly exhausted when she got home and was scared to see what our bedtime was like without your "ba-ba". On a whim, tonight, after going out to dinner where you ate so much pizza, your daddy and I decided we'd see what happened if we didn't do a bottle at bed. Honey, this really breaks your mama's heart in some ways because it's always been our time to cuddle before the end of the day. But baby you made me so proud tonight. You cuddled for a few minutes, kissed me goodnight, pointed to your crib and said "bye-bye". Clearly this is a bigger deal for me than it is for you. Mama's working it out. We'll get better but I hope you are sticking to this mentality because-- with a frog in my throat, not a real frog baby but the emotion was choking me-- I packed up your bottles. Every single one of them.

Except for one emergency major back up. I know it's best if we don't use it so keep snuggling.... Please?


Wednesday, January 30, 2013

A Picture's Worth a Thousand Words

This makes me smile for so many reasons.

1.  Kelsey + Luke = BFFs!

2.  Besides his daddy, Luke is basically obsessed with TV and iPhones.  I know we should find other ways to entertain him but, well, sometimes we need the easy way out.  He will literally sit down anyplace if offered the chance to watch.

3.  Look at our poor old Annabelle, looking all beat down.  She used to be so spoiled!  And we still love her but it's clear she knows she's fallen a few notches.

4.  The drapes we hung in our bedroom when we moved in almost two years ago and vowed to replace ASAP.... still hanging too short in the background.

Yep, a picture's worth a thousand words!  Happy Humpday!

Friday, January 25, 2013

To Grow, or Not to Grow

1.  To grow.     Luke was sized for new shoes yesterday.  Turns out he needed to go up not one, but TWO sizes.  He's now in a size 6!  I knew it was time for a new pair, but two sizes?!?!?!  Poor thing probably thought I was binding his feet for an international cultural experience.

Aren't these cute?  These are the new kicks!

2.  Not to grow.      So I was all thinking (based on the shoe sitch) that we were going through a growth spurt and then I get a text this morning from my nanny, babysitter...whatever ya wanna call her, we love her!  She said:

 "I think these pants are too big :) he's been flashing all morning. LOL"                    

HAHAHAHA!!!!!  And these fit around Christmas time... So now I'm left wondering... are we growing or shrinking!?!?!  

Happy Friday!  We'll be going shopping for more shoes (and pulling out the old pants!)....

Wednesday, January 16, 2013


Mama guilt, no more!  Fact is, I'm pretty proud.  We got a clean report at the dentist (staining was due to medications and polished right out!).  Add to it that Luke was a champ for not only the exam, cleaning and polishing but he didn't even bite anyone!  Small victories!  The dentist said to keep brushing after the bottle before bed and ditch it when we're all ready.  WHICH by the way, is THIS FRIDAY or soon.  This mama is getting back from a work trip Friday afternoon and packing up the bottles before picking lil man up from the babysitter's.  Crossing my fingers that this doesn't ruin my long weekend! Have a great rest of the week and hope you get a long weekend too!

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Mom Guilt

Well, it's official.  Worst case of mom guilt.  EVER.  Kels and I both noticed Luke's teeth looked funny on they had this line across the front of his top two teeth.  The nanny noticed yesterday too so I'm hoping guessing it just showed up... surely the odds of all three of us overlooking that is just impossible.  Anyways, like any overreacting responsible parent, I called the pediatrician's office.  She mentioned a couple potential culprits (breathing treatments, medications, bedtime bottles, vitamins, or if he bumped his teeth on something) but said regardless, she would like us to get in to see a dentist. 

I did my research last night and called a pediatric dentist this morning.  And we go tomorrow!  I have no idea how they will get my wiggle worm to lay still, let alone open  his mouth without him biting them like a wild animal.  I told them I can barely change his diaper but I wish them all the luck in the world, so we'll see.

If you think of it, say a little prayer at 8:30 tomorrow morning for Luke's sake (and mine!).  Not sure who will need the nitrous more, me or him!  We're hoping he just needs a cleaning and that it's not from a huge mommy FAIL of giving him a bottle before bed. (Yes, I still give him a bedtime bottle and no I don't need a lecture on how he doesn't need a bottle anymore...point has clearly been made.) Oh, and if you're not sure why to avoid bedtime bottles, google "baby bottle rot". 

Good Lord, don't let my babies teeth rot and fall out of his mouth.  He's much too handsome to be toothless!!!!!  I already have visions of his first day of school pics with a backpack and no teeth.  AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Thursday, January 10, 2013


So, have you seen the show Diggers?  It absolutely has to be the most annoying show on TV!  There's these two weirdo's with metal detectors looking for...metal I guess?...

So anyways, I've been fighting a cold for almost two weeks so every night I lay in bed for hours, just waiting to fall asleep.  The other night, I headed to bed and Kels decided to stay up and watch some "guy shows". 

Next thing I know, it sounds like THE most annoying game of Taboo is playing out in the living room.  Like every five seconds, BBBBEEEEP,  BEEEEEP, BEEEEEEEEEEP!  Ugh.  So, that's my two cents. 

Don't let your husbands watch Diggers if you expect to get any sleep.  End Rant!  Now I'm off to catch the sandman again.  YAY for tomorrow being Friday!

Friday, January 4, 2013

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Yada Yada Yada

Well, I know everyone can relate but it's just been a whirlwind since Thanksgiving!  Plus, I've been having some blogger troubles and...well, what's a post without pics!?!?  Thankfully, I've got that figured out now!

So...what have we been doing other than Christmas shopping, decorating, playing with Luke, wrapping up the year at work, travelling, spending time with family and friends, cooking, cleaning....yada, yada, yada?  WELLLLLLLL....  I took off work from the December 21 through January 2!  It was UH-MAAAAAY-ZING.  I honestly wondered if this much time at home with a crazy almost toddler would send me running back to work relieved, but (*sigh*) no such luck.  It just made it harder to go back!  Kels's comment was that "some people don't even take that long after they have a baby!".  Touche, my love.  Touche.

But I digress..... back to The Holidays!

We headed to OKC for early Christmas celebrations with that side of the family.  Luke decided he wants to watch a 3:00 minute movie trailer, on repeat for the entire three  two hours.  Which of course is really convenient because I don't have one of "dem fancy DVD player thingies" in my car.  Um, hello, my car is almost as old as my college diploma-- I love it, but never really saw the need for a DVD player.  So, I sit in the back with the iPad (in the seat originally intended for the dog!) and start and re-start the 3:00 Angry Birds Star Wars trailer for the majority of the drive.  Okay, so it wasn't that bad, especially since the movie kept him busy, but I certainly added a DVD player for my car to NEXT year's Christmas list!

Disclaimer:  This MIGHT actually be from our Thanksgiving trip up.  Who can remember at this point!?!?!?

Luke got lots of loot from his cousins and Grammy and Pop and he loved spending time with everyone!  We played at his cousins house during the day and cuddled with Grammy and Pop at night.  He even got to meet one of his daddy's friend's new babies, and he actually was really sweet with him!  Luke didn't take Pop up on the fillet we had for Faux Christmas Dinner, but one day soon, I'm sure we're in trouble!  We didn't think to get a group shot with all of us together so, maybe soon!

Luke playing with his cousins and Aunt Kristin

He had so much fun out of town that he actually slept on the way home.  SCORE one point for mommy!

Next up was Christmas with our local side of the family.  We went to church on Christmas Eve (where we promptly took up a whole row to sit together, yes we are that family) and as long as Luke could stuff yogurt melts in his mouth, he was fine.  So, when we ran out of melts just as communion was about to end, daddy quickly rushed lil dude out of the service.  We hustled home, changed clothes and headed to nana and papa's for a yummy steak and lobster dinner!  (No turkey this Christmas!  We rocked beef tenderloin at both sides of the family --- which is FIIIIIIIINE by me!)

I swear, it doesn't matter that we get together with my extended family almost once a week...all eight adults and three kids, nearly every Sunday for dinner.  It's still crazier on Christmas.  And to compare this year to last, when Luke slept or cried the majority of the time, is just crazy!  The boys were all over the place but my niece does a great job keeping them in line!  That being said, we didn't get a group shot there either!

But, guess what?  The next morning, we woke up to realize that Santa left stuff at our house for Luke -- AND at his Nana and Papa's!

We celebrated at home and opened gifts, pretty quickly actually since Luke just wanted to play with the last thing he had opened.  Then we joined back up with the fam, for more gifts.  Talk about spoiled!  Some of the best gifts for Luke were:

his tunnel/ fort

his school bus with a slide for the "emergency exit"

a huge sucker

another play tent with Thomas the train

lots of toy cars, a car wash station, a guitar and trains...all things boy, this boy loves!  The tunnels and forts have been a blast so far, and they keep him busy and literally laughing out loud, forever!  If you need a gift idea for a 1 - 2 year old I definitely recommend the fort and tunnels and tents!!!!

So, Dallas actually had a white Christmas this year!  We got between 4 and 5 inches of the good powdery stuff up north by us.  Typically it's just ice, so we of course had to bundle up the "baby" and take him out to "play".  So, my "baby", my bald baby, doesn't like hats.  At all.  By the time we got him bundled up enough to go "play", he was so mad he threw a fit outside and landed in the cold snow.  And he was DONE FOR.  No snow for Luke, this year.  Total time spent preparing to play in the snow = at LEAST 30 minutes.  Total time outside in the snow = 2 minutes.  Mommy FAIL.

The good news is, we did document it, so we can relive the laughing!

Basically, between the time off work, and the nasty weather that limited getting out and about, Luke and I got lots of time to play with his new toys!  Daddy had to work most of the time, but we came up with a plan to put the toys in big baskets in his closet and we'll switch them out to keep the newness of the toys and avoid ADD from the whole, look at this, play with this, what do you think of this!  We laid around in the mornings and watched movies at night.  See?  He even likes to sit sideways in the chair like his mama.

That's his feet in the footed jammies, kicked up on the armrest next to mine.  Hilarious that he lounges!

And we danced.  Not much makes me happier than a dancing baby!  It's hilarious.  Of course the one time I tried to video tape him dancing to jingle bells he started to act all sleepy but...we left the singing Santa out in hopes of getting a video before Santa goes in the attic till next year.  Cross your fingers, k?  Here's a mild booty pop on the off chance that we can't get him to break it down on camera soon!

We were also lucky enough to have several dinners out with friends that we don't see as often as we'd like.  We laid around, ran errands and just spent time as a family.  With all the sadness (from Sandy Hook to the stories on Facebook that leave me bawling and wondering "what I can do?"), I took the opportunity to do something.... to do something for my family and spend time undistracted and relishing in our little accomplishments.  I'm typically a "grass is greener" kinda gal but my goal for 2013 is to soak in the details of our life.  Speaking of goals, New Year's was low key and we did fun things like pose dinosaurs on sippy cups.  but we are so blessed for a great 2012 and look forward to what 2013 will hold. 

OH!  And, since I ended up rushing on our cards and not sending out as many as I would have liked, if you didn't get yours, please know that we still love you.  Here's your virtual card--- it's a little blurry since it's my proof but ya get the idea!

As I look towards the new year, I feel like there's a lot of sadness "out there".  Between the daily news and the never-ending updates on Facebook and other social media, my heart has hurt lately.  From Sandy Hook, to a high school friend who's wife (she's my age) is fighting for her life (a great life with her husband and their four young kids), to a friend-of-a-friend's son fighting cancer (he's just 18)'s all around us.  It's like we take our news intravenously and it's always there, ever present.  Everyone knows someone going through some crisis or another.  I'd like to propose we all try to spread some random joy in whatever way possible.  I know with Anne Curry's idea of 26 random acts of kindness, there's got to be lots of good going on.  It just seems like sometimes it's more sensational to focus on the bad...or on a personal note it's my nature to be a bit pessimistic.  I'll try to blog about things I am doing to spread cheer...not to toot my own horn but because I think we need some joy to be creeping into our daily lives.  As an example, check out my friend's amazing blog at  Long Live Happy.  She posts her random acts of kindness and it always makes me smile. THAT'S the good stuff.  And THAT is what I'm determined to live, share and spread in 2013. 

So, here's to the New Year.  May we find more joy in each day and more ways to share it with those around us.  I find joy in my family, it's time to share it with the world and spread a little happy!  Happy New Year!