I started to dilate more and they realized the magnesium wasn't slowing my labor (yes, it was magnesium I think...not merconium like I said before? Who knows! It really was all a blur - and none of you really care WHAT it was, right? Just know there was something they gave me to try to stop it all from coming so quickly!) At that point, maybe 7:00 in the morning, I was given a dose of steroids to try to beef up baby boy's lungs. The next dose could be administered in twelve hours so we were hopeful I'd make it.
But I didn't.
What felt like maybe an hour later, the anesthesiologist came in and said she had only a few minutes to do the epidural so she had some quick questions and gave me a quick overview. Did I have any questions? Hell, no, just give me the epidural before it's too late! So, she popped that thing in there so fast and pain-free in comparison to what I had been feeling. (She's awesome by the way. I can't remember her name anymore, but she was so cool, and even checked on us later to give us some suggestions for doctor's for Luke, etc.) Not only was the anesthesiologist awesome, but the epidural was big time relief! And with the pain gone, I could focus on calming myself --- and my husband! -- down. And shortly after that, my doctor was in to check on me again and I was embarrassed but said, "I either peed the bed or my water might have broken". And, not sure now which would have been worse, but it was my water breaking. Things really flipped into high gear. As my doctor said that we were going to have this baby in the next hour or so I kind of panicked -- we can't have him now! We haven't taken the childbirth classes, or the parenting classes! We aren't even registered to GO to the classes until September! Kelsey said something about getting the Cliff's Notes version and squeezed my hand. Right then, I knew we were all going to get through this together. It was going to take some incredible medical intervention for our little boy, but I knew we'd all be okay.
Kelsey was a rock. I'm pretty sure he must have had some valium or something but we was cool and calm and there's not a thing I would have changed about the was he looked at me in that moment. This was about to happen. We were seriously becoming parents...in the next hour! WOAH!
A team of probably 12 or 14 people came into the room (or maybe it just felt that way?). There was my doctor and a team of nurses with me and another team waiting to tend to Luke immediately. I had given Kelsey strict instructions from the time we found out I was pregnant.... he would NOT be down south during labor. So, I -- in the midst of all this craziness -- had them wheel my bed to the center of the room so he could stand behind me at my head. Literally three pushes and the doctor even went "Woah!" on the last one. Luke was ready to be here. Poor thing had a cone head like the SNL skit - he'd been just waiting patiently in position for so long his little noggin was really pointy! He was bruised along the left side of his body and having trouble breathing but they wrapped him up in a little foil looking suit, gave us a quick peek and then wheeled him down to the NICU. Kelsey joined Luke while my doctor finished things up with me.
AND.THAT.WAS. TORTURE! Not knowing what was going on or how he was doing was just awful. I'm sure they kept me posted but all I could do was ask to go down to the NICU. They wouldn't let me go see him until my epidural wore off. The test for that was to be able to lift my legs from a sitting position. So that's all I did for the next hour or two. My family came in to see me, my in laws were still driving down from Oklahoma, but I just sat there trying to lift my legs. The second I could get some air on those bad boys, I was wheeled down to the NICU where I got to hold sweet Luke's hand. We took our first family photo - I'm pretty sure it was this one...
Looking back now, it's amazing now how far we've come. And we're only four and a half months into this crazy game of parenting. We still have so many questions that we will never truly have answers to. There's no telling what in particular caused this. There's no certainty for what the future holds, if this is a given for our next baby. We just pray that as tough as little Luke had it, our next baby (if there IS a next!) won't have to journey down this road again.
It wasn't quite the story we had expected, but it's our story and it's made Luke such a little fighter. He's stubborn. He's sweet. And most of all he will never, for one second, ever, be taken for granted. He's our little blessing, our million dollar baby. Whatever you want to call him. We are just happy that he's home. He's ours. And he's healthy!
We go for a weight check tomorrow - say a prayer that he's back to gaining like he's supposed. We had a slow down last time we were there and it set off a caution bell with our pediatrician. So, if you think of it, we'd appreciate the prayers that things continue to progress as they should! Our sweet little man!